Eat to Live

You need food to survive. I won't disagree there. But do you need as much food as you eat? If you're like me, the answer is no. The old adage "Eat to live, don't live to eat" is running through my head this morning.

My body is 6 months postpartum. Half of my baby weight melted off right away. I felt pretty good about myself as I slipped into my pre-pregnancy clothes without any effort. Now, 6 months later, those clothes are starting to feel tight. You read that right, I'm gaining weight, not losing it! I'm frustrated with myself.

In the past, I've lost weight by berating myself and emotionally depriving myself. Training for a half marathon was another way to lose weight. Today, I don't want to subject myself to the internal abuse I gave myself when losing weight before, and practically I don't think a half marathon training regimen would fit in my life right now.

So what's a girl to do? I don't want to live with the extra weight. I don't feel healthy. I don't want to use the old methods for losing weight. I want a healthy relationship with food.  

First, let's define food:

Food: (n.) something that nourishes, sustains, or supplies nutritional value

In John 4, Jesus says "My food is to do the will of him who sent me and to accomplish his work." (John 4:34) The lesson I can learn and apply from this verse is that there is more to life than physical food. Don't live to eat. Some days I look to food to give the immediate moment purpose and meaning. This brings me to the first step to having a healthy relationship with food.

Eat to Live. Ask myself, before snacking, what does eating this do for me? What am I looking to food to fulfill right now? If the answer is genuine hunger, go ahead and eat. However, if the answer is something else, I need to keep asking questions.

Don't live to eat. If I am just looking for meaning and purpose, food is not the right place to find it. Do I need to distract myself? Do something physical, like some jumping jacks? Sit down and give myself some time emotionally, with my coloring book, a cup of tea and some candles, or whatever else I enjoy? By asking myself what I want the food to do for me, I raise emotional awareness and clarity about my motives. I can then feed the need without feeding my body extra calories.

Will you join me in asking before snacking: 
- Am I eating to live, or living to eat? 
- What do I want this food to do for me right now? 
- What is an alternate way to meet this need?

Perfection

Perfection: (noun)

1. the state or quality of being or becoming perfect.

2. the highest degree of proficiency, skill, or excellence, as in some art.

3. a perfect embodiment or example of something.

4. a quality, trait, or feature of the highest degree of excellence.

5 .the highest or most nearly perfect degree of a quality or trait.

6. the act or fact of perfecting.

What feeling does this definition elicit? For me, irony and discomfort.

Discomfort because I want perfection. I think of myself as able to acquire perfection. I want to be able to do everything I put my hand to well. Do you know what that makes me? A perfectionist. 

And you know what is ironic? I want such a perfect life that I'm missing out on my real life as a result. 

Here's an example. I want to start a blog. First, I start four; testing out different names and feeling bad because I can't make them as pretty (read: perfect) as I would like. I post nothing on each, discarding them all. If I accept that they won't be perfect and simply start writing, I could put my thoughts out there and worry about how they look later. At least I would be experiencing life and moving toward my goal as a result. 

On a deeper level, perfectionism shows my pride. I want people to think well of me. My blog, if I can start it, is a portrayal of who I am. Therefore it must be perfect because I am perfect (ha!). 

I'm learning some humility. I'm starting my blog. It can look pretty second, as I start from scratch and learn things as I go. Think of it as my humble pill. 

What do you want to be perfect and miss out on as a result?