Curly Girl: Day 1

Curly Girl, Day 1

I have a love hate relationship with my hair. I've never cracked the code and figured out how to make it live up to it's full potential. This summer, I'm diving in to the world of Curly Girl and trying to figure out how to tame the beast!

So, I used Sauve Daily Clarifying Shampoo today, followed by a deep condition using BrickHausHair's cleansing conditioner mixed with 1T olive oil and 1T honey. I let that sit for 30 minutes, then rinsed and gently added Garnier Fructis Pure Clean Gel to my hair. I let it air dry and tried not to touch it. Girl, this won't work in the future. I rinsed the deep conditioner out of my hair at 8:30 this morning. It is now 3:30pm and still feels a tiny bit damp. I'd say it's dry, but in another hour it will probably pouf like a scared cat when it's completely dry.

Here's a picture from today, Day 1:

I am happy to see more definition, wave, and curl clumps, but HOLY FRIZZ. 

Becoming Mom

With every birth of a baby is the birth of another person - Mom. In an instant (well, after hours of intense labor…), everything changes. Who is this person called Mom? She doesn’t feel like me. I can feel her potential, what she might become, but fitting together the pieces of who I was and my new identity as Mom is a daunting task. In my case, medication, therapy, and time would be necessary to put those pieces back together. For all of us, becoming Mom is a time when our hearts and bodies need extra care and attention. Here are five ways we can help one another grow into Mom without losing ourselves in the process. 

1. Be Present. It's easy to feel like new parents need space and that you don't want to bother them. Should I call now? What if she's sleeping? Don't be afraid to reach out, even if it's a text instead of calling. Keep inviting her to things, even if she says no. Let your new mom friends know that you are still there for her. 

2. Help Each Other. Have you ever felt bad when another mom asked for help? I am always glad to know what she needs specifically! By communicating needs and helping each other, friendship deepens and becomes richer. 

3. Find a Hobby. Take a class, go for a jog, read a good book, find something that fills you up and DO IT. Yes, Baby takes time. Yes, the house needs cleaning. Yes, there are a million reasons not to take time for yourself. You know what? A filled up mom is worth it. YOU are worth it. Remember who you are, and stay true to it. Your baby, your partner, and your life will be better because of it. 

4. Know the signs of Perinatal Mood Disorders.  Your hormones go through a crazy roller coaster after giving birth. This is normal. We can all support moms through the Baby Blues by giving a listening ear and normalizing all of those emotions. If a mom seems stuck in the sadness, however, be aware that she could need more help. Use the Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Scale as a tool to measure a new mom's ability to enjoy life. Educate yourself with resources from the APA and Postpartum Support International. Know that you are not alone. 

5. Laugh often, and Enjoy the Moment. Help a new mom keep her sense of humor by helping her laugh. Gather up your crew of kids, wash their hands when you get there, and go hang out in a new mom's backyard this summer. She will appreciate your presence. Hold the new baby, do the dishes while Mom showers, take older siblings to the park, help keep the mood light and appreciate the little things in life. Becoming Mom is a team sport.

How has the journey of 'becoming Mom' affected you? 

What helped you the most in the first weeks of a new baby? 

Psalm 26

"Prove me, O Lord, and try me;

Test my heart and my mind. 

For your steadfast love is before my eyes, 

and I walk in your faithfulness."

-Psalm 26:2-3

Psalm 26 talks about a person who is doing everything right. He had the courage and confidence to ask the Lord to test and challenge him to discover where sin remained. He was able to ask the Lord for this test because he was confident in the Lord's love. 

We can focus our eyes on many things in life, but this man was choosing to put God's love before his eyes. He was choosing to walk in God's faithfulness. The picture here is active, not passive. 

If we want to see change and become more like Christ, we need to do two things based on this scripture. 

1) Keep God's love and faithfulness at the forefront on our mind. Feast on God's love. Step out in faithfulness. Follow God's Word. Do not allow anything else to distract us from following God.
2) Ask God, in his faithfulness, to expose areas that need change. Coming before God in full confidence of his love for us allows us to ask him to prove us, try our thoughts, and test our heart and mind. 

The first step is necessary in order to have the confidence to honestly and safely open our hearts and expose sin. 

Father God, today I pray that your love and faithfulness would overwhelm me and allow me to open my heart for you to change me. Test me and show me where I need to let your love penetrate more fully. Your gospel and your Spirit are the instruments of change in my life. Your power is made perfect in my weakness. Help me to trust you more and allow your power to change me. Amen.  

Fear of Man is Ruining My Life

Ways the Fear of Man is Ruining My Life:
Or, a tongue in cheek evaluation of where the Fear of Man affects my life. 

1) I eat too much of the wrong foods when I'm out. What will my friends think if I refuse to eat at their party? I don't want people to think I'm a snob, after all.

2) Getting dressed is a pain. I have to impress all the other mommies with babies in my life who would totally understand why I want to simplify my wardrobe, or why I have snot stains on my shirt from my 10 month old wiping his nose on me.

3) My feelings are hurt easily when I am not everyone's #1 friend. You mean someone can like and hang out with other people and it doesn't mean they hate me?!

4) As a mom of littles, I am crazy to not accept help when it's offered. Yet, thanks to the good ol' fear of man in my heart, I refuse help so that I look like super woman doing everything myself... and end up frazzled and burnt out in the end.

5) Most importantly, the Fear of Man keeps me from turning to Jesus faster and continually feasting on God's Word. Love God, love others. There is no room for "love myself and fear the opinion of others." I am feeding my the crumbs off other people's plates while sitting at the feasting table of God's love. God wants and has so much more for me.

Who is God?

How can you conjure up an image of God? There is no way our finite minds can comprehend the vastness and majesty of the God we worship. Go ahead, try.

Think big... God is bigger.
Think great... God is greater.
Think of the tiniest intricacy... God knows these intimate details.
Think of the greatest power on earth... God is more powerful.
Think of the most loving act or person... God loves more

God cares more.

He knows more.

He is more than we can fathom.

He is God.


....and you know what? That brings me comfort. If you or I could understand God, or if anyone on Earth could describe him and label him, that would make him a small god. Serving a small god would bring me to despair. It is only because my God is bigger and greater and loves more and knows more and cares for me more than I know that I have hope.

Signals, Pt 2

If Anxiety is a signal leading us to prayer, there are certain phrases which signal the focus of your anxiety. Recognizing what is causing anxiety helps direct your focus to Bible verses which will help to combat anxiety and turn your focus to the Lord.

"If only..." signals regret about the past.  Staying here, caught in the past, denies the redemptive nature of the gospel. God is the God of second chances. He delights in taking weakness and making it strong in Him. Yes, mistakes exist in your past, but they are not outside of God's perfect and redemptive plan to work good out in your life. In God's hands negative, terrible, awful circumstances you would never choose for yourself (like postpartum depression, anxiety, or tragedy), become beautiful gifts constantly directing us to greater dependence on our Lord.

"What if..." signals worry about the future. We like to sugar coat worry about the future as being proactive and planning ahead. Yes, sometimes there is a place for planning ahead. Sometimes it is even helpful to think through the what-ifs, but only if you are wrestling through the question of "Where is God when my what-ifs come true?" If what-ifs are constantly circulating through your head, question your motives. Could it be pride and arrogance showing in how you think that you can anticipate what's coming, that you are the only one that can care for yourself, and that you need to plan ahead?

I want control over things. I want to know that I can handle what is coming. But our good God doesn't promise me that. He promises that HE is good, and that he cares for me. I have to fight the what-ifs and the if-onlys running through my head and submit them, therefore, to the mighty hand of God. Why? Because He cares for me. (1 Pet 5:6-7)

The Humility of Obedience

"And being found in human form,
he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death,
even death on a cross."

Philippians 2:8

In the middle of Philippians 2:8 is a tiny little preposition, the word by. Why did Jesus humble himself by becoming obedient? Why not to become obedient? Or because he was obedient? The Holy Spirit inspired the word 'by' to instruct us. 'To become obedient' places obedience above humility, action above the state of the heart. Instead, the Lord seeks humility by becoming obedient. I believe that the word by unlocks a new understanding of both humility and obedience. 

We gain humility by becoming obedient. If I pray for and seek humility as an antidote to pride in my life, I must become obedient. If I seek to obey God's Word, humility will come out of that desire. 

Obedience is humility in action.  Disobedience places my Self as the highest authority. To obey is to put my desire second and do as I am commanded out of reverence. This is humility displayed through action. 

To seek humility, start by obeying. That one little word, by, gives instruction for gaining humility in life. As the Lord enables us to obey his Word, He will develop in us a spirit of humility. 

How can you put humility into action? What command in God's Word is the Lord asking you to obey?